Personal Note On Social Acceptance - 1846 Words

Social Acceptance When starting this personal change project, I found it easy to find a subject for me to change because it was something that I had wanted to do for a long time. I am a people pleaser. I am controlled by people’s opinion of me. Plain and simple, I want to be accepted. It is exhausting, and not possible. To begin to change, I had to embrace the reason’s I was a people pleaser and needed others acceptance. Acceptance and Rejection The need for acceptance always comes with the fear of rejection. The need for acceptance is a powerful motivator, but the fear of rejection can be even scarier. We can all think of a time where we were rejected, and when thinking on that memory, and I bet you can still feel the sting. â€Å"Fear of†¦show more content†¦Need to belong Nathan DeWall, a Psychologist at the University of Kentucky says that â€Å"Humans have a fundamental need to belong. Just as we have needs for food and water, we also have needs for positive and lasting relationships.† The need to belong can be so strong that we are willing to change who we are just to belong to a group. Most times it is small changes. For people who are people pleasers, we will go out of our way to help others, even if that means we are neglecting ourselves, just to get their approval. Self Esteem and Rejection According to Geraldine Downey, PH. D., professor of psychology at Columbia University, Research says that people whose self-esteem is lower will experience rejection as more painful, and it ll take them a little longer to get over it, he says. Meanwhile, those who have higher self-esteem -- but who aren t narcissists -- tend to be more resilient.† Rejection for someone with low self-esteem is more damaging because they are less resilient to the hurt. A step that I have only begun to work on is my view of myself. I am not comfortable with who I am. I am always conforming to what others want me to be because I don’t have confidence in my true self. It is easier to be who others want you to be then to be who you really are. There is less rejection, if you go along with others idea of who you should be. My Personal Change Story I am controlled by others emotion,